Nobody Is Perfect
by aZnfantasygoddess
Summary: Nobody can interpret love. Everyone has their own definitions and although they may be similiar, none of them make sense. But everything started to make sense when Rin became Nobody.


Nobody Is Perfect  
By, aZnfantasygoddess

XxSummaryxX  
Nobody can interpret love. Everyone has their own definitions and although they may be similiar, none of them make sense. But everything started to make sense when Rin became "Nobody".

One-Shot

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**...The Beginning Is...  
**_...Based on a True Story...  
_**...The Rest...  
**_...Is Fiction...  
__**...FanFiction...  
**_--------

_**Love**__ (Lûv) __**1.**__ a strong or passionate affection for a person of the opposite sex. __**2.**__ sexual passion or desire, or its gratification. __**3.**__ a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a friend (or between friends), parent, child, etc. __**4.**__ strong predilection or liking for anything_

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_I am Nobody  
__Nobody is perfect  
__Therefore I'm perfect_

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It was not a long time ago when Rin was in the arms of the one and only:

Sesshoumaru Taishou.

It was not a long time ago when he had to move to Japan due to the business of his father. It didn't bother Rin that Sesshoumaru was rich, she wasn't like the other girls who dated him for money and proclaims that he is _perfect_. They were wrong right there. Sesshoumaru has his flaws here and there, only Rin seemed to know what they were. That's why she felt so special at some occasions where she's alone with Sesshoumaru or announced as his girlfriend.

_Rin...Sesshoumaru's girlfriend...that's her..._

Everywhere she went seemed more lonely and she just couldn't help but imagine what Sesshoumaru may be doing right now. And what she thinks of, everytime, always comes and jabs her hard in her heart. She knew it was going to happen, how could you possibly keep a relationship overseas? It was quite impossible. Her only way of connection with Sesshoumaru was through phone and via MSN Messenger. She knew something was wrong...when Sesshoumaru started to say "Me too", after her "I love you"s. It pained her more when he paused for three minutes...

_"I love you Sesshoumaru," Rin whispered into the phone as silence took over their conversation. There was a nagging feeling that tugged at Rin's heart. She couldn't help but feel it everytime she was getting ready to say bye. Three whole minutes passed by...and her heart jumped with every second._

_"Me too," Sesshoumaru sighed as Rin squinted her eyes. _Me too_? What was that? More silence took over._

_"Well, I gotta go now Sesshoumaru," she bit her lip. "I love you a lot. I miss you too."_

_"R-Rin," he started his voice stuttering. "I-I don't think we should...go out anymore."_

What?

_"S-Sesshoumaru?" she knew it. She had for awhile now. He was breaking up with her. She had given him her heart and he gave it back...ruined, destroyed. Never planning to ask this question and deciding against it... "Why?" Oops..._

_"Rin," his voice quivered. "I think I love somone else." Her eyes widened. That she knew too well. How can a relationship work when he was overseas? What about him telling her that he had never felt this way about anyone before? He was her first love, first kiss, first...so was he mad that she never slept with him? Her eyes burned as tears escaped her eyes._

_"O-oh...I see," was all she managed to say. Her brain was empty and nothing could explain the imense tugging and war with her heart. "Wh-who's the girl?" she heard a sigh on the other line._

_"Kagura," he answered. "You don't know her but...I just don't know Rin...a part of me loves her and a part of me loves you...I'm really confused. I feel so stupid, I should have never said that."_

_"What is said is said Sesshoumaru," she bit back sobs. "Why?"_

_"She needs me Rin...she needs me more than you," he replied as Rin felt like dying. Why couldn't you die of a heartache? It's better than feeling it. She _needed_ him more than her? What BS was that? He told her everything and he told her that he's never told anyone else. Did he tell Kagura his deepest secrets? "I still love you."_

_"Don't lie to me Sesshoumaru. Don't give me that bullshit telling me you love me just so I will hold on," having no idea where that Rin came from, she gasped out tears. "I love you too." _

_"Look Rin, I'm really sorry, if you find anyone you like, you have my full permission to be with him," he explained. BS..._

_"You are my first love Sesshoumaru, I don't think I'll get over you..." Rin sobbed into the phone. She didn't care if he could hear her...he needed to._

_"I'm so sorry Rin," she heard him take a deep breath. "You make me want to cry...and you know I never cry."_

_"I'm sorry Sesshoumaru, I'm sorry for not holding you tight enough, if I did, probably this won't happen. Anyways, I'm tired. I'm going to bed, bye." _Click.

It's been three months so far and she still hadn't moved on. Sure she's been with other guys...but only because she wanted to get over Sesshoumaru and...she wanted to make him jealous, but everytime she tried, he always rubbed it back in her face. Well, he didn't really, but that's what it felt like. He didn't care no more. He was back to the person he was before they started dating. Mr. Ice King. He didn't even call her anymore, they only talked through Messenger now.

_KillingPerfecti0n: Hey  
__RInnY: hello_

(Note on the side, he always says "Heya!" not "Hey")

_KillingPerfecti0n: I heard you have a bf  
__RInnY: dumped him  
__RInnY: how'd u know?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: inuyasha  
__KillingPerfecti0n: why did you dump him?  
__RInnY: dunno, didn't like him no more  
__RInnY: why?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: just wonderin  
__RInnY: ohh...kk  
__KillingPerfecti0n: yeah...  
__RInnY: how's u and...kagura? i think it was?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: yeah...we're good_

(Damn. That was a pain to her heart.)

_RInnY: oh...that's good...  
__KillingPerfecti0n: she saved me the other day?  
__RInnY: u didn't get into fights again did u?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: no  
__RInnY: that's a relief  
__RInnY: what happened?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i'm not saying anything until i know the truth  
__RInnY: what? what truth?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: don't worry about it  
__RInnY: can't i know?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i need to know the truth first_

(What truth was there that he was hiding from her? Did it have anything to do with her? Of course, she would never ask that...but she was curious. Did he find out about her recent feelings? That she hasn't gotten over him?)

_RInnY: sesshoumaru  
__RInnY: tell...me...  
__KillingPerfecti0n: it's just...i think kagura's cheating on me_

(Karma. What goes around comes around right?)

_KillingPerfecti0n: she said she isn't, and i believe her  
__RInnY: u do? why?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i love her too much to let her go_

She couldn't reply after that. What was the point of talking to him anyways? To get hurt more?

_KillingPerfecti0n: i almost comitted suicide because of that  
__KillingPerfecti0n: but she saved me_

What did she do? Have she ever saved Sesshoumaru like that? Was she ever the reason why he lived? She's help him through a lot, yes. But has she ever saved him from killing himself completely?

_KillingPerfecti0n: i don't know what i would do without her_

She knew he wouldn't call her. He just wouldn't. He wouldn't call someone he doesn't love right? She's only a friend. _Although I wish I could be more._

_RInnY: sesshoumaru...you need to know...  
__RInnY: that if you ever dare kill yourself  
__RInnY: i'll follow right after  
__RInnY: i still love you  
__RInnY: and i always will_

The window display that he was typing a message. Shutting her eyes tightly, sh exitted the window and logged off.

She remembered a thousand years ago, or what felt like it, when he and she would argue about his past, how he though nobody would care if he died. That's when she volunteered to be Nobody.

-------

_At first you said I was perfect...  
__And since Nobody is perfect...  
__Then I must be Nobody...  
__Then you forgot...  
__And said that Nobody cares...  
__I'll be Nobody for you again...(cause I care)  
__Then you said Nobody will die for you...  
__I'll be Nobody for you again...(cause I will die for you)_

-------

Maybe being Nobody meant nothing to him. That was why he decided to fall in "love" with someone else. Probably nobody can fall in love with him, but someone can huh? She didn't understand that sentence right there but...she just knew that _someone_ can't love Sesshoumaru like she did.

She logged onto MSN the next night. She wasn't surprised to see Sesshoumaru online.

_KillingPerfecti0n: Hey...  
__RInnY: whats up with the dots???  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i...have to tell you something..._

Her heart pound at the mentioning of that. What did he need to tell her? Perhaps his feelings for her had resurface? He still loved her? He did? Did he?!

_RInnY: what is it?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: remember how i told you i'm not afraid to smile at the hands of death?  
__RInnY: sesshoumaru...where r u gettin at?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: well...  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i got in a fight with a gang  
__KillingPerfecti0n: now they're out there to get me  
__KillingPerfecti0n: instead of hiding like i do  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i'm gonna confront them  
__RInnY: by yourself?  
__RInnY: you can't do that!  
__KillingPerfecti0n: why not?_

She wanted to type: Cause I love you Dummy! But that was not an option. She had to think of something fast.

_RInnY: what about Kagura?  
__RInnY: she won't let u  
__RInnY: you have to stay alive for her!  
__KillingPerfecti0n: she'll move on  
__RInnY: but i can't!_

Whoops. _Whoops_ big time. Damn those fast typing fingers.

_KillingPerfecti0n: you will too  
__RInnY: does Kagura know?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: no  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i don't want to hurt her_

_But you want to hurt me_. She thought. Why did he tell her anyways?

_RInnY: why r u telling me this?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: you're the only one i can tell  
__RInnY: when do u plan to do this?  
__RInnY: cause i won't let u!  
__KillingPerfecti0n: what can you do, an ocean away?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: and i dunno  
__RInnY: i can TRY to get to not do it!  
__RInnY: make u feel guilty for trying to attempt it  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i have to eat lunch  
__KillingPerfecti0n: be back in 20 mins if your still here  
__RInnY: trust me, i will  
__KillingPerfecti0n: cya then_

That was starting to kill her inside. What would she do knowing that Sesshoumaru isn't gracing the ground of the earth? How will she live knowing that she could have stopped him but couldn't? What can she do to tell herself that it wasn't her fault for loving Sesshoumaru like she did? Better yet, will she ever be able to move on like she planned? The answer was simple. No. It was impossible. For the next fifteen minutes, her head leaned on her computer desk as she sobbed out the pain she had been holding in for Sesshoumaru. She cried for Sesshoumaru. She cried for Kagura. She cried for the Taishou family. She cried for InuYasha. She cried for...herself. Life would never be the same if Sesshoumaru isn't in it. She didn't care no more if he won't be her love, she just wanted him there to be her friend. She wanted him to die for leaving her, but not die in that way. She wanted to hurt him so bad, but knowing that he will never be jealous if she had a new boyfriend, she had no ideas. She can't let him die. For the sake of Kagura. Yes, Kagura. Someone she had learned how to hate with a passion although she didn't know her. Sesshoumaru saw something better in her than in herself. But she can't let Sesshoumaru die. No matter how it would please her mind, it will pain her heart forever. Sesshoumaru must _not _die. An hour has past by when her computer beeped. She looked up to see Sesshoumaru back.

_KillingPerfecti0n: you're still here  
__RInnY: of course  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i'm planning to go tomorrow  
__RInnY: what?! no you can't! i won't let u!  
__RInnY: sesshoumaru!  
__RInnY: stop being stupid okay?!  
__KillingPerfecti0n: what?  
__RInnY: don't go okay?  
__RInnY: there's a lot of us in the world that loves u  
__RInnY: u can't imagine how many ppl will hurt after knowing what u did  
__KillingPerfecti0n: are you okay?  
__RInnY: no! i'm NOT ok!  
__RInnY: u just can't go okay?  
__RInnY: u just can't...we all love u too much...  
__KillingPerfecti0n: what can happen anyways?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: i'm just going over to Kouga's for that school assignment we were  
forced to do_

What? Why didn't he tell her earlier?!

_KillingPerfecti0n: so what were you babbling on about?  
__RInnY: i uh...well...uh nothing!_

The mood was better than usual, and she didn't want to break it so she said nothing more.

_KillingPerfecti0n: if you say so  
__RInnY: yep!  
__KillingPerfecti0n:D_

He...grinned? He's...acting like when...they were together.

_RInnY: so how was lunch?  
__KillingPerfecti0n: great actually  
__RInnY: so what'd u have?_

And things went better from there.

The next night, she logged on again, but Sesshoumaru wasn't there. She wondered what may have happened but then suddenly remembered that Sesshoumaru said that he had a project with this "Kouga" dude. Sighing, she was about to log off when a window popped up.

_SexyInu: hey rinny  
__RInnY: inuyasha?  
__RInnY: hey!  
__SexyInu: how r u?  
__RInnY: good n u?  
__SexyInu: alrite  
__RInnY: figures, how's japan?  
__SexyInu: good, alrite, miss u tho  
__RInnY: aw i miss u too  
__SexyInu: did u talk with sess yesterday?  
__RInnY: yeah? why?  
__SexyInu: did he say anything?  
__RInnY: he said he was studying with Kouga today  
__SexyInu: oh...weird  
__RInnY: why wats up?  
__SexyInu: nothing  
__SexyInu: i gotta go now, ttyl!  
__RInnY: bye_

Wonder what that was about.

For the next couple of days, Sesshoumaru wasn't online at all. Neither was InuYasha. A month passed by slowly and both Sesshoumaru and InuYasha was never online. That was...awkward. Rin started to worry so she used the MSN block scan to see if they had blocked her or something. And sure enough...InuYasha did. When she saw this, she bit her lip nervously as her eyes burned. Why would InuYasha of all people block her? What was up with the Taishou family?

Another month passed by and Rin was all into her school work. She gave it everything she had. She didn't care if Sesshoumaru was ignoring her or if InuYasha blocked her. She couldn't do anything about it so why would she care. The month passed by fast with her working hard on her projects. She was brought herself from low rank to top five in all her classes. It was worth it, and for once. She actually felt better.

Now the thought of Sesshoumaru ignoring her and InuYasha blocking her still nagged at her mind. So she did the only thing she could by emailing the Father herself.

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To: Inu Taishou (itaishou (a) taishouinterprises . org)  
From: Rin Yamanaka (rinny763 (a) hotmail . com)  
Subject: Hello Mr. Taishou

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Hello Mr. Taishou, or rather, you told me to call you InuTaishou. Well, hopefully you still remember me, Rin. The Rin as in Sesshoumaru's ex-girlfriend. I've been wondering lately why both your sons are ignoring me. I mean, Sesshoumaru fine two months and a week ago, we were talking fine and then I never talked with him since. Then InuYasha the same too. What happened? Sorry for bothering you Mr. Taishou, but I really care a lot for the Taishou family and I want to know what's happening over there. Is it so bad that everyone has to ignore me? Please answer to this as soon as you get this. Thank you.

Much Love,  
Rin

-------

I knew I went to far by emailing the father. And I know, no one would really do that, but I knew InuTaishou well. I saw him almost everyday when I was dating Sesshoumaru. I even consider him as my father sometimes. It was a week later when I got a reply from InuTaishou.

-------

To: Rin Yamanaka (rinny763 (a) hotmail . com)  
From: Inu Taishou (itaishou (a) taishouinterprises . org)  
Subject: RE: Hello Mr. Taishou

-------

Hello back Rin. It's nice to get to talk to you again. And I'm sorry that my son has been ignoring you. I think he's just still a little...not well. I will try to explain everything in this email, and I still hope you will still email me back and still think of us the same because well...you'll find out soon. Two months and a week ago, minus two days...Sesshoumaru's body was found...dead. He was bleeding pretty badly, with major cuts here and there. There was a bulletshot right through his heart, the guy who shot him must have good aim, and a bulletshot on his left arm. He had bruises all over along with those cuts. His breathing was pretty shallow when the cops found him. He was put in ICU for three days until he couldn't hold anymore and...passed away. I know this is a touchy subject...for both you and me, but you need to know that Sesshoumaru isn't the only guy out there. He wants the best for you and you should probably move on. No, you should move on. Sesshoumaru's no longer with us, and InuYasha, who seemed to never cared about his older half brother when he was still alive, is taking his death badly. We are still looking for the person or rather yet the people who killed him. And you shouldn't worry about Kagura, she's moved on and is with a business tycoon named Naraku. I hope you don't think too much about this and remember that the Taishou family is always here for you. We love you all the same.

Sincerely,  
Inu Taishou

P.S.  
Sesshoumaru wrote you a letter, I told InuYasha to send it to you but I guess he hasn't. I'll get it from him so I can send to you. Expect it in a week or so.

-------

She swore her lungs stopped working. As well as her heart and every other function...except her brain. So when Sesshoumaru came back from lunch that day...he was acting all weird because he knew he was going to be gone right? He knew that he was going to be gone so he wanted to show her the best side of him, the side she loved, before finally leaving her. Her body shook and her heart pained more than ever. But this time, no matter how hard she summoned her tears, they weren't spilling. Her breathing was fast and horrid. She was gasping for air as her hand clutched her heart.

_"I still love you." _(I love you too Sesshoumaru.)

_"...a part of me loves her and a part of me loves you..." _(So love me only.)

_"__...I love her too much to let her go..."_ (But I love you too much to let you go.)

_"_..._You're the only one I can tell..."_ (So you must trust me then, right?)

_"...but she saved me..."_ (I can save you too.)

I wanted to save him, but it was too late for anything. You can't revive the dead. Nobody can. _Nobody_. Even if I was that _Nobody_...I can't revive him...

--------

Somewhere Else

--------

Between the gates of Heaven and the Universe, Sesshoumaru looked down as he saw his stepmother shedding tears for him. He always thought it was dumb to cry. It was a sign of weakness. He had no clue why his stepmother was crying for him. InuYasha stood stiff and he could catch the smallest hint of shaking. InuTaishou, his father, stood there with a glazed look over his eyes. He was gone now. _Dead_. He knew he stood no chance against those gang members. He knew he was going to die. And here he was, his assumption correct. The Angel of the Gate looked over to him.

"Sesshoumaru Taishou I presume? Your time has not yet come, but you have came early due to gang kill, so tell me, are you going to wait for someone or are you going to reincarnate now?" The angel asked as his blonde locks fell across his clear sky blue eyes. Sesshoumaru pondered over the question. Wait? Whom would he wait for? Kagura? Rin perhaps? He can't admit, but somewhere deep inside his heart, the torch of light that Rin held is there. To be honest, Kagura has never helped him with his problems, she always thought of her first before anyone, that's what he liked about her. Now what he liked about Rin was, she thought of others before she thought of herself. They were both opposites. Kagura stopped his suicide, yes, but she was yelling, telling him he was stupid if he was going to kill himself. That's why he stopped. It wasn't because he felt something for her that made him stop. It was her hurtful words that made him felt weak. Yet he still loved her. But he had to admit this, he loved Rin too.

"I want to wait," he responded.

"You have until eighty-eight in earth years, to wait since that was the day you were suppose to come up here, although, I must forewarn, if the person you're waiting for comes up here and that was their day, only you will reincarnate and that person will have to wait another twenty years until they can reincarnate, are you still willing to wait?" the beautiful angel asked.

"Yes." He responded with certainty.

A month, in earth years, has passed since his death and he saw Rin very eagerly working on her school projects. So you might be questioning how he can do this? Easily. You can see anywhere from the Gates of Heaven. Thus he has been checking on Rin and Kagura. Rin seemed so oblivious to everything, it hurted him a little. What was all that crap about not hurting after death? He was in pain right now, knowing both the girls he cared about didn't give a damn about him. Kagura was with another guy now. He had no clue but after giving the guy a second look, he identified the man to be Naraku Onigumo, a business partner of his father. He should have guessed Kagura wouldn't stick out for long. But he still felt a tugging at his heart when he thought of her. He still loved her too. A month later after that escapade, Sesshoumaru saw a tearing Rin. Well, she wasn't crying at first, but he could just feel her life begin to fly out of her. His eyes widened and his heart jumped as his breath hitched, but when Rin suddenly started to bang her desk with her fist, he knew she wasn't going to die anytime soon. What caught his attention were the tears streaming down her face. How many times had he made her cry. He didn't want to know now...he knew it was a lot.

-------

Back to Earth

-------

_Dear Rin,_

_I know that when you receive this letter, I will no longer be here. I just want you to know, that I want you to move on. After I have finished writing this letter, I have went to met up with the gang, they are called the Klynx Gang by the way. Just thought you might want to know for the future. I'm sorry for all the things I put you through, and I know how many times I apologize, nothing will make it better for you. I really hope you can find someone who can love you more and much better than me. Someone who won't fall in love when he's away, like the stubborn person I am. Well, I was, since I'm not here anymore. I won't say anything that will disable you to move on, but you need to know that I always cared for you and always will. I want you to be happy, if you're happy, then I'll be happy also. There's much more I want to say, but they'll never make any sense. Please take good care of yourself. And if you really love me like you said, please...don't kill yourself because of me okay? You're not Nobody, you're somebody that can make a difference in everyone's lives._

_Sincerely Yours,  
__Sesshoumaru Taishou_

_P.S.  
__ll'I tiaw rof uoy ta s'nevaeH etaG._

He told her to live on for him. So she did. Two years and a half has passed by and his postscript still messed up her brain. Was Sesshoumaru somewhat drunk while writing it or something? But that didn't matter. What did was the fact that she was no longer nobody, but _somebody_. She was not the Nobody who cared, the Nobody that would die. She was the _Somebody_ who cared, and the _Somebody_ that would die for someone. His words were an impact in her life, and everything seemed brighter than ever. There was laughter next to her as she looked over to her friend Ayame.

"Hey, what's up?" she asked as Ayame giggled and wrote down something on the paper.

_Y...E...H...(space)...D...I...P...U...T...S_

Yeh Diputs? Is that some kind of donut?

"What's that suppose to mean Ayame?" she asked confused.

"Hey Stupid!" she exclaimed and Rin laughed as she looked at it more and then noticed that Ayame wrote it backwards.

"Ohh!" and we laughed our heads off. She started something else.

_I...(space)...E...V...O...L...(space)...A...G...U...O...K_

"You do?" Rin _pretended _to gasp. Ayame blushed. Suddenly something popped into her mind. _Shit_.

"Umm, Ayame?" she started. "I have to go home, I forgot something." she nodded as Rin stood up and made her way to her car. She drove home and entered her bedroom. She took a key from her drawer as she went to the flat box locker that she kept something dear in it. She opened it and revealed Sesshoumaru's last letter. She opened it up and looked at his postscript again.

_P.S.  
__ll'I tiaw rof uoy ta s'nevaeH etaG._

She breathed in as she put the letters in order in her mind.

_I'll...wait...for...you...at...Heaven's...Gate._

Tears slipped from her eyes again, they were tears for him, again. She wasn't Nobody anymore, she's Somebody now. Was she ready to give up being Somebody and return to no one? Was she ready to give up everything she had worked for in those two and a half years?

Yes.

She was.

Sesshoumaru was everything to her. She loved him, she was loyal to him after his death. Let's just hope he was too. And hope that he's still there.

_Wait for me Sesshoumaru...I'm coming..._

-------

A/N: Sorry, for writing this and not updating my other stories. This idea just came all a sudden and I got so excited I had to squeeze it into a one-shot or I would end up writing a 20-Chapter Story and that's the last thing I want to do since I have a lot of other stories to finish. Please leave a review for this story!! I wrote it in three straight hours! Please review!!!


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